OCTOBER 2023 NEWSLETTER
AIRDRIE OVER 50 CLUB
Mmmmm that turkey looks good. I really do like autumn - the wonderful colours and crisp, cool air and warm meals with friends and family. I am not so taken with winter though which, of course, is just around the corner. So, who has their Christmas shopping done yet??
Our Community Links presentation this month (on October 4 at 1:30) has been changed from Grandparents Parenting their Grandchildren to Transportation in the city of Airdrie. If you would like the Grandparent info, let me know, and I can pass it along to the person in charge. We need more than just a few interested folks to proceed with this topic.
Our travel this month is to Oktoberfest at the Austrian Canadian Club in Calgary, on October 12. Jean may still have a ticket left so, if anyone is interested, please call her at 403.948.3312, also she will start a waiting list. The cost is $50/member. The bus will leave the club at 10:30am and return around 3pm. Cost includes the buffet, entertainment, and transportation. You will have to purchase your own beer. No news about travel for November yet.
New Members: Welcome to the Over 50 Club. Please check at the club for your membership card. They are in a small accordion box on the desk on the left as you enter. The club is open during the daily activities but locked otherwise.
Halloween Howl. The Halloween dinner and dance last year was so well received it is happening again this year so keep October 28th open for fun at the club. Tickets should be ready for sale by October 9 and are $5/member and can be purchased at the club, but not on-line. This is a pot-luck event with meat being provided and a signup list posted at the club for attendees to indicate their donation of salad, potato dish or dessert. Please don’t forget to bring your own dishes/cutlery/cups. There will be a bar available for $5/glass. Doors will open at 4:30 and dinner is expected to begin around 5:30 with music starting around 7pm. Our Ways’nMeans director, Arnold Kurz is looking for help with set-up, clean-up and take-down so any time you can offer will be appreciated. You can contact him at firstname.lastname@example.org This event is just open to members at this point because we have only 90 tickets to sell, but will be opened to non-members if there are any spare tickets. There will also be ticket draws for door prizes throughout the evening.
Keep in mind, our Executive has all fulfilled their time commitment and will be stepping down at our AGM in January, so we need folks to come forward to give their expertise in the running of our club. Of course, there will be support and training for all positions. We are looking for a President, Vice-President, Treasurer, Secretary, Membership Director, Maintenance Director, and Hall Rental Director. Please speak to Myrtle Brewster (email@example.com) for information if you are interested and see the job descriptions posted at the club.
Jo-Anne Jagers will have 10 spots for her Mixed Media Angel class on Friday, October 13, at 9am. The cost will be $30/person and includes instruction, an 11 x 14 canvas, and other necessary materials. You can sign up at the club or contact her at 403.844.0525. Her November class will be a 2-page Christmas theme layout for your art journal – more info in the November newsletter.
Lynda will hold another polymer clay session on October 20 at 9am, possibly doing Christmas decorations or coasters and the cost will be determined by participants’ choice. See the sign-up sheet at the club.
Phyllis’ October Wednesday classes are: (These classes are already full)
October 4 & 11 - Mandala art on a dish soap dispenser and a CD. Bring your own
tools or purchase tools at the class.
October 18 & 25 – Mandala Art on terracotta dish and a phone holder. Bring your
tools or purchase tools at the class.
Nov. 1 - Finish up wildflowers and abstract paintings.
Friday classes: (There may still be space available in these classes)
October 6 & 27 – Abstract Art.
Nov. 3 – Finish wildflowers and abstract paintings.
Nov. 8 – Resining of October mandala art.
For more information contact Phyllis at 403.877.3894
Dave Stevenson and his wife Norma have moved their ballroom dance classes to Thursday afternoons at 4pm. Contact him at 403.980.2779 for information on the cost.
A reminder too to update your annual membership if you have not already done so as I will be updating my contact list this month. This can be done on our website by credit/debit or at the club by cash/cheque. A new form needs to be filled out each time you renew in case of changes, and it can be put with your payment in an envelope in the grey box.
Also, please be aware that if you are paying for a club outing/membership on our website you need to click on the PLACE ORDER AND PAY button on the bottom left to finish your order completely.
Jokes & Such:
A huge stack of toilet paper fell on me in the supermarket. I’m OK though, just soft tissue damage.
When I offer to wash your back in the shower, all you have to say is yes or no. Not all this “who are you and how did you get in here?” nonsense.
A snail talking to a tape dispenser: ‘Wow, I think you went too far with the plastic surgery!’
A sweet grandmother telephoned St. Joseph’s hospital. She timidly asked, “Is it possible to speak to someone who can tell me how a patient is doing?” The operator said, “I’ll be glad to help, dear. What’s the name and room number of the patient?” The grandmother in her weak, tremulous voice said, Norma Findlay, Room 302. The operator replied, “Let me put you on hold while I check with the nurse’s station for that room.” After a few minutes, the operator returned to the phone and said, “I have good news. Her nurse just told me that Norma is doing well. Her blood pressure is fine; her blood work just came back normal and her Physician, Dr. Cohen, has scheduled her to be discharged tomorrow.” The grandmother said, “Thank you. That’s wonderful. I was so worried. God bless you for the good news.” The operator replied, “You’re more than welcome. Is Norma your daughter: The grandmother said, “No, I’m Norma Findlay in Room 302. No one tells me shit.”
When you are 20 and you drop something, you pick it up. When you are 80 and you drop something, you decide you don’t need it anymore.
How can you increase the heart rate of your 70-year-old husband? You tell him you are pregnant.
Three older fellows were out walking. The first says, “Windy, isn’t it?” The second says, “No it’s Thursday.” The third says, “So am I. Let’s get a beer.”
You know you’re getting older when you have a party and the neighbours’ don’t realize it.
If my body were a car, I would trade it up for a newer model – every time I cough, sneeze or sputter, my radiator leaks, and my exhaust backfires.
I was begging God to give me a hot body. Great! Now I ‘m enjoying the hot flashes of menopause.
American psychologists have isolated two fundamental reasons why men frequent bars.
1. They don’t have a woman.
2. They have a woman.
I heard that some people wear those special socks or pantyhose to prevent thrombosis on long airplane flights. Well, I don’t need that. I still wear my trousers from 6 years ago.
An elderly man was on the operating table, about to be operated on by his son, a famous surgeon. Just before they put him under, he asked to speak to his son. “Don’t be nervous, boy, just do your best and remember, if it doesn’t go well, if something happens to me … your mother is going to come and live with you and your family.”
I’ve read so many horrible things about drinking and smoking recently that I made a new, firm New Year’s resolution: NO MORE READING!
Last year, I replaced all the windows in my house with those expensive double pane energy efficient kinds. But this week, I got a call from the contractor complaining that his work had been completed for a whole year and I had yet to pay them. Boy, oh boy, did we go around! Just because I’m blonde doesn’t mean that I am automatically stupid. So, I proceeded to tell him just what his fast-talking sales guy had told me last year. He said that in one year, the windows would pay for themselves. There was silence on the other end of the line, so I just hung up, and he hasn’t called back. Guess he was embarrassed.
A little old man shuffled slowly into an ice cream parlor and pulled himself slowly, painfully, up onto a stool… After catching his breath, he ordered a banana split. The waitress asked kindly, ‘Crushed nuts?’ ‘No,’ he replied, ‘Arthritis.’